Had a human being created it, I would’ve called the album pretty god damn ridiculous. The first song, “IANAHB,” is a 5 minute, piano-driven flood of nonsense, complete with lines like, “She said my dick could be the next black president,” and “I’m with my killer bees, fuck bug spray.” I stopped trying to figure out what the hell Lil Wayne was talking about a long, long time ago – though I can tell you that his dick seems to have been through a lot – but this song, this explicit, confusing preaching over only the sounds of classical piano, takes his absurdity to another level. I was pissed, because bashing a CD is exhausting work.

But then a weird thing happened: the album got a lot better. I don’t know if there was something otherworldly going on, but all of a sudden the beats became pretty sick and the rhymes, even by human standards, became pretty funny. Lil Wayne didn’t become famous for nothing; he’s more or less a rap genius, and he has more hits on the Billboard charts than Elvis. There might not be anyone better than him when he’s, you know, with us. But he tends to get a little fucked up; he loves his purple drank, and it’s kind of amazing that he’s alive, let alone productive. He’s been rapping since he was a little kid, and his first son was born when he was 15(!). To enjoy to his music, which at times can be wildly inconsistent and even downright stupid, you probably have to try to imagine how absolutely insane his life must be.

He’s back in form on IANAHB II, though. Maybe he’s on his way to assimilating himself back with the rest of the human race. I felt like I needed to take a shower after listening to a few tracks, and quite honestly I think someone could be arrested just for having this album in their possession; so that must mean he’s back. The album really takes off on the 3^rd track, “Days and Days,” and I really have to credit 2 Chainz for the turnaround. Nobody enters a song better than 2 Chainz; he announces his arrival on a track with such gusto that it’s impossible not to get excited. Lil Wayne keeps himself more or less in check during the middle portion of the album, which is where the best songs pop up; “Trigger Finger,” “Rich as Fuck,” and “Trippy,” are the highlights of the album.

On “Back to You,” the 6^th track on the album, Lil Wayne illustrates some of the problems he has to deal with. “Should I call somebody else/cuz girl it’s almost 12/this dick won’t suck itself,” he cries multiple times throughout the song. Maybe he isn’t so different from us after all. I mean, who hasn’t been there? Who hasn’t had that 11:30 freak-out moment? If he hadn’t so proudly proclaimed throughout the album that he’s a Martian, I wouldn’t believe him, because those are, like, real problems.

The penultimate track, “Wowzers,” is just a straight-up porno, in which he likens his tongue to an Uzi and his dick to an AK. Again with that dick of his; if I have one complaint about the album, it’s that he talks about his dick way, way too much. I feel like I kind of know what it looks like, and that scares me. But that’s Lil’ Wayne. He’s going to share way too much information. He’s going to make you uncomfortable. There are declarations made on the album that I don’t even want to type; after he dropped the line “I’m in the ocean gettin’ shark pussy,” I had to officially take it off the karaoke list.

So listen to and enjoy IANAHB II, a well-done collection of transmissions from Weezy’s drug and sex filled utopia that serves as his home planet. Just don’t listen to it with your mom. Just don’t do it.

Grade: B