^BEFORE^

^AFTER^

I'm starting to wonder if these guys are incapable of staying clear of trouble. First, they get sketched out in the ghetto, then they're robbed, and now the entire touring crew (The Malones and Aircraft) can say their dicks and rights were molested by state troopers, and all because of this obvious musicians' van. I mean, look at it. If "potsmokers" aren't riding in that van, a child molester is...I don't think that helps their case, actually-- especially the drummer of Aircraft, Blank Blank*, who was thrown in handcuffs on the side of the highway and hauled to a West Virginian holding center for a pinch of shrub. 

That's right, people. After the boys' van was ripped apart, the only thing these coppers have to show for their suspicions is a crumb of herb. 

What makes things worse is the spectacle of the seven dudes, an open van, and a trailer full of equipment on the side lines that evidently caused a wary oncoming trafficker to (RIGHT BEFORE THEIR EYES) crash into another car, then clip a motorcyclist and send him soaring and skidding across the highway to land in an embankment. Luckily, the dude was cool and fine, but Blank was still arrested and "thrown" in "jail."

After all of that, Blank was released without any sort of monetary exchange. Although soon after, he discovered his wallet was missing, as well as his knife and camera. Some state troopers out in bumfuck WV are probably taking selfies in their patrol car with a pocket knife to send to LIVE SEX Tatiana, courtesy of Blank Blank's Mastercard.

Oh, and there isn't even a souvenir mugshot to boast. The whole thing was a spook arrest, because SOME PIGS had to stick their greasy knobs in a bowlful of citizen's fear. And again: our tax dollars at work. And a couple of smashed cars and an airborne motorcyclist later...behind the music, right here. Stay tuned for more shenanigans because Aircraft and The Malones attract that shit like ugly on an ape.

*Name "blanked" for job security purposes.