Detroit, MI, is the newest location of our Buffalo boys, The Malones. After their run-in with a girl gang in Cleveland (see Episode II), this Robocop rendition at PJ's Lager House was a sight for sore eyes. The band rocked the pants off of Detroit. Brandon Schlia says, "We just walked off stage, and it was siiiiiiick." I think there were seven i's. Maybe there were more. He was quite excited.

Whoddathunk The Malones would be so translatable? We fuckin' did! Point two for Buffalo!

If the crew can make it out of Detroit, they will be making their way through Cincinnati for a gig at The Chameleon. Rumor has it there are wild packs of dogs that attack the residents of Detroit. There is one confirmed report and another denied report. I want to believe it's true, just because that's like some The Ghost and the Darkness, Stephen King, SyFy shit right there. And also, an allusion to Modest Mouse's "Wild Packs of Family Dogs."

In what Brandon calls a city that "looks like the aftermath of a zombie apocalypse [with] a lot of windowless masterpieces of architecture", I half expect Batman to come swooping through to The Malones' rescue. I feel like a pack of stray dogs might could take on Batman, but old money almost always wins.

TO BE CONTINUED...