As a Scot (Gordon Clan, what WHAT what WHAT) – and as an English-speaking human in general – I've a special, plaid affinity for “Auld Lang Syne.” At midnight on New Year's Eve, no other song quite captures the feeling that, 1) “[insert previous year] is dead. It's really dead;” and 2) “I'm already drunk, aren't I?” So, to prime you for the weekend festivities, here is a rundown of some of the best modern appropriations of this classic poem.

The Smiths – “Asleep”

Say what you want about The Smiths. In the 80s (and I'm just guessing here), they were the band that could make the Varsity quarterback assume you were “gay” while you secretly hooked up with his girlfriend (most likely with both parties crying the whole time for some convoluted reason). The melody of “Auld” can be heard briefly at the end of their B-side “Asleep,” and it's particularly moving because right now it's 3am on January 1, 1986 and you are holding QB's girlfriend's hand while he black-outedly hits on your weird friend because it turns out she looks good in pink.

Ghostbusters II

The Ghostbusters films are some of the greatest comedy (horror??) movies of all time. I've heard anecdotal evidence that Bill Murray didn't even read the script (or know they were filming??), adding to his Übermensch arua. In case you haven't seen this sequel since Ecto Cooler was the rage, there is a scene in which the citizens of New York City start singing “Auld” as a show of goodwill and ameliorated propinquity against the forces of evil. Unfortunately, after scouring what DOESN'T feel like hundreds of Ghostbusters II clips, I couldn't find the one where the crowd uses this classic to say, “I got your 'New York Cares' for ya right here, pal” to the malevolent diety Vigo. So, in lieu, here's some Bobby Brown:

Nicki Jaine - “Auld Lang Syne”

Planning to hunker down in the basement – any basement – and get all Goth Talk on the 31st? Thankfully, you don't have to resort to that “Jet Black New Year” EP again in 2012. This Nicki Jaine cover is so Dark Wave, if you didn't have a reason to use Bauhaus as a “pick me up” before... Then, well. Now you do.

Forrest Gump

When incidental genius Forrest Gump is in New York City on New Year's Eve, "Auld" plays in the bar, while confetti rains down and Lt. Dan stares off into the existential void. The pair then picks up a couple prostitutes, and Forrest goes down in history (yet again) for being the first person to ever COMPLAIN that a hooker tastes like cigarettes. That's sort of the whole point, you know?





Prince - “Auld/Purple Rain”

According to the internet, there was a New Year's Eve 1987 performance in which Prince was joined onstage by Miles Davis for a rendition of “Auld” that segued into “Purple Rain.” Since I couldn't jam more awesome words into a sentence if I tried, I hereby quit writing. And again, couldn't find a clip, so here's some Birth of the Cool instead:

Tom Waits - “New Year's Eve”

I'd like to take this list out of the 80s, so, in all of its gruff hobo majesty, an excerpt from Tom Waits' “New Year's Eve,” released earlier this year:

Alright, kids, get weird for NYE. 'Cause on Sunday, you gotta quit smoking/lose weight/be a less shitty person. Don't you.